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Musings of a Malcontent: Curiosity Often does Kill the Cat

Curiosity is so curious. We need more of it“Musings of a Malcontent” is a weekly op-ed by GlobalWarmingisReal contributor Carlyle Coash

Curiosity is curious.

Profound, yes I know. I do what I can to impress.

What I mean to say is that if you are a person who is curious about the world, it may result in something unexpected.

Awareness.

Actually awareness is the first part. Next the potential for hesitation, for skeptisim, to set in becomes real. I think this is because you begin to see what truly is – underneath the spin and the lies. Curiosity engages that aspect of us that looks at a situation from multiple sides.

This can be dangerous.

For much of my life curiosity has been a blessing and a curse. I learn a great deal, yet I also question a great deal. I think this generally annoys people, or at least the people who would just like me to do what they say. Sadly the curiosity itch requires scratching much of the time.

We each have our crosses.

Once again the folks at Harper’s magazine have given me some insightful tidbits into the world in which we live. You might say – “There is no way these things are true!” At this point I think you know better.

After all Snooki is a star – so that alone should pursuade you to question everything.

Anyway – for your interconnected amusement here are a few items that might give you pause. Again they might not seem connected to the subject of this blog – but I think they are. They reflect how off-task we are – that we would spend our energy on these things and not assuring we are around in 1,000 years.

Or perhaps they might just stir your curiosity.  Enjoy!

1. Scientists turned white ibises gay by feeding them mercury.

Do scientists really have nothing better to do? Mercury = gay? Yea, it is that simple. Insult to all the gay people in the world, not to mention direct torture with a deadly toxin. One is compelled to ask the purpose of such an undertaking. Was there a concern that the Ibis was not gay enough? No wonder I kept seeing so many Ibises at Pride this year. The rainbow colors do look fabulous against the white feathers –so I can see why the scientists were so eager to try.

2. Sleep-deprived Swedes are uglier that well-rested ones.

Gee, thanks. Good to know they share a trait with everyone else in the world. Anyway I was getting tired of all those Swedes bragging about great they look with no sleep. Take that Sweden!

3. The U.N. announced plans to launch a satellite powered by feces.

Have you noticed a theme in my posts of inventions that utilize feces? Honestly, they just keep pooping, sorry, popping up. I wonder which animal feces make the best rocket fuel. My guess is any that comes from the Washington DC area.

4. People whose arms were stroked by a robot nurse named Cody felt more comfortable if they believed Cody was cleaning them than if they believed Cody was attempting to comfort them.

Frankly a robot doing anything to me while in the hospital might put me off. My concern would be it ripping off my arm and using it to comfort me. I watch too much science fiction. Somehow this does not seem the solution to the nursing shortage.

5. There is a minimum of 22,000 man-made objects orbiting the Earth.

And some of them run on poop! Go technology!

6. At least $25,000,000 was spent in 2010 treating pet obesity in the United States

Another shining example of why our country is crashing into the mountain. We would rather overfeed our pets than feed those in the world starving to death. $25,000,000 to treat pet obesity? Does that mean kitty liposuction? Doggie nip and tuck? Gerbil Weight Watchers?

I know – how about you just feed them less. Yeah – I am so wacky.

Now could I have that $25,000,000?

7. In England, Slimbridge scientists surveyed the fatness of swans’ behinds

Other than the lovely play on words of scientists from Slimbridge studying fat, once again one wonders how this benefits anything. Have swans been breaking too many park benches with their big behinds? Do their butts possess the cure for cancer? Is there a link between swan ass fat and the dissolving of the Ozone layer?

Luckily when they are done they can send the swans to the US to get trimmed up.

8. Great whites are calmed by AC/DC’s “You Shook Me All Night Long”

It has the same effect on me.

9. A six-year old Croatian boy previously thought to be magnetic was now thought simply to be very sticky.

I almost fell off my chair when I read this. Too bad really, since now his X-Men mutant coolness factor just went way down. Sticky fingers are just so common these days.

10. An earless rabbit was born in Fukushima, Japan.

Nothing to see here – please keep moving – nothing to see.

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